I walked into that courtroom ready.

Two weeks of preparation. The judge's summary written. Exhibits organized. Every question I might face, rehearsed.

I was ready.

And then Eddie's attorney filed a last-minute motion.

Not to argue the contempt. To ask the court to declare the entire divorce decree void.

All of it.

Everything the judge already decided. Everything that was already agreed to. Everything I have spent two years fighting to keep.

They want it gone.

I stood there and understood what was happening. And I felt the ground move under me.

The hearing stopped. Nothing was resolved. We all walked out of that room and nothing was different than when we walked in.

Except one thing.

The judge gave me the opportunity to respond to the motion. She didn't rule. She just said I should have the chance to be heard.

That is one quiet thing I am holding onto.

The lawyer has until May 17th to finalize his filing. Then I have 30 days to respond.

That is the window I am working in.

I went home and I fell apart.

I wanted to quit. I am not going to pretend I didn't. Two years of this. Tens of thousands of dollars. All the way to the Georgia Supreme Court. And now we are back at the beginning, but harder.

I spent two days in it.

I talked to friends. I talked to my brother. I prayed.

And somewhere in those two days I landed on something.

Maybe this is exactly what is supposed to happen.

I don't know why. I don't have a clean answer for that. But something settled when I stopped fighting the fact of it.

And then I thought about something else.

I made Eddie and his attorney prepare for that hearing. I made them show up. They had a whole legal team. I had two years of living inside this case.

And I made them come.

That felt like power.

Not the power I wanted. Not the outcome I prepared for. But something real.

Something mine.

Jaycee has been close. She doesn't know what a divorce decree is. She doesn't know what void means. She just knows where I am. And she stays there.

Some weeks that is the whole lesson.

Jane
(and Jaycee)

P.S. The judge's direction means I have a real response to write — and I may need focused help to write it well.

If you know a family law attorney in the greater Atlanta area who takes on limited scope representation, or you know someone who might, I would be so grateful for an introduction.

You can reach me at hello@janeandjaycee.com.